|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 2, 2012 22:25:07 GMT -6
I'm feeling too proud that you adopted my nickname for him.
That aside, you could very well be right even if it's not portrayed as such.
/steals the word mopeblob because it's awesome
|
|
|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 2, 2012 22:32:19 GMT -6
Anyway.
Goosefeather asks Blue Sue to come with him to buy drugs help him gather herbs and the Clan is all "GASP he's acting like a medicine cat again."
"Did he want to talk about the prophecy? She'd assumed he'd forgotten - and was beginning to think that it had just been one of his wild predictions that came to nothing."
As it should have been. One has to wonder why prophecies are so important, anyway. They're often used as excuses for illogical events, with their vagueness excused by the laughable line of "They would be too dependent on StarClan if the prophecies were too clear!" Er, they don't depend on StarClan for anything. Stupid advice, sometimes. But they can easily live without that. So the question remains: If prophecies always predict the future and they'll happen whatever the cats do, what's the point of giving them anyway?
/stops digression
Goosefeather just commented that Bluefur visits Whitekit a lot but never visits him, and they're both her kin. Bluefur thinks that he's "madder than a hare" and is "...suddenly frightened that he could read her mind." What? Why? I guess illegal substances CAN have strange side effects...
They discuss Blue Sue's ambition to be deputy, and things actually get slightly interesting as Goosefeather mentions that Sunstar wants a cat with youth and energy to serve beside him when Blue Sue mentions that she's too young to be deputy.
Bluefur suggests Thistleclaw as an option, and Goosefeather says: "That young warrior is the reason you must become deputy. Blood lies in his path. neatly gift-wrapped with pretty ribbons Fire lies in yours." let's hope you trip into it and burn
"Bluefur stopped pulling leaves as she felt the medicine cat's gaze burn her fur. He was staring at her, his eyes ablaze." due to overuse of his laser powers, his eyes incinerated momentarily.
He sends her away with some leaves they picked, and before he does so tells her she must only focus on the prophecy and nothing else including breathing and sleeping
Bluefur wishes she could talk to Snowfur to "untangle the jumble of emotions seething in her belly." I read this and thought her stomach was her brain. That's where emotions usually are, though I'll admit to having found one or two in my fingers and a couple in my spinal cord.
Thrushpelt pops up and offers to help carry the leaves. Blue Sue thinks "Why couldn't he spark the same feeling in her as Oakheart did?" Because he's not a Forbidden Plot Device Lover, sweetie. Heaven forbid you fall in love with someone normal.
Then Thrush asks her who she thinks is going to be the next deputy and mentions Thistleclaw has his heart set on it, but says the senior warriors would be best. Blue Sue counters with youth vs. experience, and wonders why Thrush isn't interested in being deputy. I think it's obvious; he doesn't want the huge responsibility, neither would I. He's actually moderately likable, if a somewhat bland character.
He offers to share prey with her but like the rude cat she is she makes an excuse and goes to see Rosetail, who deducts that Blue Sue has her eye on the deputyship and tells her not to miss out on other things.
Tigerpaw comes in all enthusiastic from battle training and there are a few ridiculous lines to comment on.
"Any injuries?" "Not yet." Tigerpaw sounded disappointed."
Yes, I'd be terribly let down if I weren't in pain and bleeding.
"The strength in the young tom's shoulders was impressive and his claws seemed to have outgrown the rest of him. They'd left scars in the earth so deep it made her shiver."
The latest in excavators: The Tigerpaw.
And lastly from Goosefeather: "I'm sorry, StarClan," he muttered. "That cat should not have survived. This was never meant to happen."
Because you know, evil is evil through and through forever. What are these shades of gray you speak of, Erins? CAUSE I AIN'T SEEING THEM.
|
|
|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 4, 2012 16:11:47 GMT -6
This chapter starts with a charming scene of Blue Sue playing with the kits and thinking about Thistleclaw and Tigerpaw, and then we get this gem of a line:
"Tigerpaw had grown so quickly that he looked like a warrior after only a moon of training."
Clearly Thistleclaw is in cahoots with Goosefeather, and obtained steroids for his apprentice. Whether Tigerpaw is taking them with or without consent in unknown.
Then Blue Sue thinks this sweet if nonsensical thought about Whitekit:
"She was going to make sure he made it to warrior without any serious injuries. She owed it to him and Snowfur."
Woah, lady. I know you're his foster mom, but unless you're planning to be his eternal stalker, that's impossible. Also, how would she prevent that? Fling herself in front of him whenever anything attacked him? You're called WARRIORS for a reason, Blue Sue, and that reason has nothing to do with avoiding injuries.
Sunstar strolls along and tells Blue Sue to find Thistleclaw and Tigerpaw and patrol with them on the border because he's been getting reports of invading kittypets. Blue Sue tells us she knows Thistleclaw made those reports because he wants to fight kittypets and teach Tigerpaw to hate them. She thinks he's doing this to make sure Tigerpaw doesn't "follow in his father's pawsteps"
While I admire the fact that Sunstar actually tries to keep kittypets out, unlike Blue Sue will as leader, it kind of seems thrown in just to underline (again) Thistleclaw's bloodthirst. Like Hollyleaf's uber-belief, this seems kind of thrown in. I'm aware that all people cats are different, but it's not like Thistleclaw was raised to love violence so much, or was raised by an uncaring family who beat him. Sure, he could be a bit battle-happy, but being this "ROAR I HATE YOU ALL" without any clear cause for it seems a bit forced. Another way in which the Erins do not think their characters through.
Blue Sue walks in on Thistle and Tiger training, and of course Thistleclaw is being too harsh. He's too harsh/mean/bloodthirsty about EVERYTHING. Well, he liked Snowfur, but that was it. He's not allowed to have any moderate or gentle elements, because that would make him an interesting character and we all know the Erins forbid those from intruding in their orderly little world.
It gets dumber when the three start to patrol and this conversation happens:
"I know what you're doing," Thistleclaw growled." (Guilty as charged, sir, I am indeed being even dumber than the authors intended.)
"Bluefur was alarmed by the ferocity of his mew. "What?" (If you want actual character development, come alone at midnight. Bring two birds and a squirrel)
"Playing with Whitekit every time my tail's turned." (That's a hanging offense, Miss Bluefur. The courts would like you to proceed to the noose now.)
"He's my kin!" She snapped, anger surging in her paws (It washed through my body like acid, and I was reduced to a pile of bones and ash.)
"He's my kit!" He retorted. (The DNA tests say differently) "Just remember that! I can stop your dumb games any time I want."
Um, Hedgehog, weren't you complaining just a few chapters ago that she didn't spend enough time with him, and now she does, and you're also ticked? I suppose continuity was already dead after the first few warrior books, and the first half of this one just sent it further down into the underworld. This explains everything.
"...but the moment I think you're turning him soft (er? He's a fuzzy little kitten, how much softer can he get?), the games will stop, get it?"
BUT THE GAMES HAVE ONLY BEGUN! MWAHAHAHAAHAAH!
-cough- Anyway.
Blue Sue is about to give him a piece of her mind (as little as there is to go round in there) when Tigerpaw says he smells kittypets.
Blue Sue says the scent is a kit's and not worth following. For once I agree.
Cue appearance of small black kittypet. This is Scourge, by the way, currently known as Tiny.
Thistle asks Tiny what he's doing on ThunderClan territory. I think it's kind of obvious what he's doing: obliviously trespassing because he's a dumb kit. Shoo him off and have done with it.
Blue Sue says he's no threat. True. Thistleclaw says "An intruder is an intruder, Bluefur! You've always been too soft on them." While this is true to an extent, I'm with Blue Sue for once. Thistleclaw's being an idiot.
And thus the infamous episode where Tiny gets his scars from Tigerpaw viciously mauling him for no good reason and his hatred of Clan cats ensues. Yup, that whole battle happened just because Thistleclaw and the apprentice he taught were morons.
Bluefur is shocked and horrified, which is fair enough. The idiocy of BlunderClanners never fails to amaze.
"Rage throbbed in Bluefur's paws as she stared after them. (the pulses beat in time with me banging my face against a desk) I'll never let you take power in this Clan, Thistleclaw!"
Oooo, ominous.
|
|
|
Post by celestialsquared on Oct 4, 2012 18:47:55 GMT -6
I like how the book tries to make Tigerpaw a monster from the get-go. I mean, the whole part where it seemed he grew faster than any other apprentice is just ridiculous. It's like expecting the kid who hit puberty faster than all the other kids to grow up to be a serial killer. And Thistleclaw just seems like he's taking out his personal issues on everyone else.
|
|
|
Post by mistytail on Oct 4, 2012 20:02:06 GMT -6
Pricklebutt - I mean, Thistleclaw seems like his whole character did a 180. And where the heck did Tigerpaw's violent streak come from?
|
|
|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 4, 2012 20:33:26 GMT -6
Why then he wouldn't be Obviously Evil, of course!
Hehe Pricklebutt.
Apparently Hedgehog/Pricklebutt who is so full of evulz.
|
|
|
Post by mistytail on Oct 4, 2012 20:34:11 GMT -6
So full of evil he makes the hairs on his own neck stand up.
And his booty.
|
|
|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 4, 2012 20:40:19 GMT -6
Whitekit is becoming Idiot Extra number #33, better known as Whitestorm.
"As Sunstar pressed his muzzle to the white warrior's head, the Clan broke"
...into a thousand pieces of bad writing and little fuzzy bits that smelled funny.
"Bluefur closed her eyes, relief washing over her like rain. I kept my promise, Snowfur. I kept him safe."
No doubt by stalking him like the creeper you are.
"Bluefur hadn't been Whitestorm's mentor after all."
Amen, Sunstar has some degree of sense.
"She had involved herself whenever she could in Whitestorm's training"
Which involved lessons on how to be the perfect ThunderClanner. I have an extract here. (don't ask me how I got it.)
1. Suck up to the main character. If they die, suck up to next Sue/Stu that comes along
2. Please refrain from having a complex, interesting personality or being more than a prop to support said main character.
3. If you gain an important position, you need only do two things: a) Breathing. b) Saying cliched, obvious-as-gravity lines that everyone will take as Wise and Wonderful.
4. Don't break the warrior code. Unless it's for the main character, or if the plot leash commands you.
5. In addition to being our glorious lord and master, the plot leash also enforces mind control over us so that we do not disobey its rules. The plot leash is the warriors' highest law. Defying the plot leash will lead to death, injury, or the loss of a shallow love interest.
6. StarClan is always right, and they are never to be questioned. Using logic on them is strictly prohibited.
ALL HAIL THE PLOT LEASH! AMEN!
"Spottedpaw spent every minute shadowing Featherwhisker, fascinated by how much he knew about herbs and cures."
What KIND of herbs? Hmm? Hmmmmmmm? I have my suspicions about Goosefeather's descent into insanity...
Then we're informed that Thistle who has "established himself as a senior warrior" and Tigerpaw (who is now the infamous Tigerclaw) have both taken nests near the center of the warriors' den.
Which is supposed to be only for senior warriors, who are senior by AGE AND EXPERIENCE, not by declaring themselves so. Tiger's only been a warrior for four moons, as the book informs us, Thistle...maybe sixteen or so?
I smell a plot hole, and it smells like cigarette fumes. A small one, to be fair, but still, WHY? Why haven't these two idiots been made to sleep on the edge like all the other young warriors? They're "shunning the outer den apparently." (SHUN the non-believers! SHUUUUUUUUUN!)
"No warrior had challenged him, though Bluefur wasn't sure if that was because his denmates respected the fierce, dark tabby and his former mentor - or feared them."
-gigglesnort-
Yes. Clearly they fear their own Clanmates because they can see the plot. Clearly.
"Thistleclaw had become like a father to the dark tabby in Pinestar's absence; he had trained him to win at any cost (um, isn't that what warriors are supposed to do?), defending his methods as part of the warrior code, though Bluefur saw no honor in the way Thistleclaw fought for his Clan."
Now I know Blue Sue doesn't like Thistle, and I understand why. (though honestly I sometimes prefer him to her just because he hates her) But this doesn't even make sense. She describes that his methods are 'defended as part of the warrior code' which implies that they're against it, or so harsh and cruel that they wouldn't be allowed.
I'm thinking that if they wouldn't be allowed, some other cat besides Blue Sue would have noticed and punished Thistle and Tiger.
Perhaps they only fight in front of her to **** her off.
That makes perfect sense.
Whitestorm (I'm tempted to call him Whitey, but as a far more awesome cat has that nickname I won't) comes up to his crazy aunt and says:
"Thank you." The white tom's mew had grown deep. "You have given me so much."
I guess being related to the protagonist has its perks like plot armor.
"Bluefur's heart swelled. I won't let anything hurt you, ever.
Because I solemnly swear that I will stalk you until I or you die, and if I die I'll stalk you from StarClan, brushing sharp bits of twig out of the way and making sure no boo-boos ever begrime your fragile skin.
And of course, this is promptly contradicted in the next part.
"Bluefur's gaze clouded as she reached up and licked a stray tuft of fur on the warrior's shoulder. (which I'm sure he found weird) She noticed with a pang the scar behind his ear. (A SCAR?! Oh noes!) Tigerclaw had done that when he unsheathed his claws (or his EVIL powers of EVILNESS) during a training session, when both cats were still apprentices. Bluefur had blamed Thistleclaw."
Because you know, blaming Tigerpaw, who actually did it, would have made too much sense.
She relates the following exchange (after Whitestorm got his oh so horrible scar):
"If you taught Tigerclaw (hey, shouldn't this be Tigerpaw? They were both apprentices at the time) respect for his Clanmates, it would have never happened."
"His Clanmates must earn his respect." What?
"But Whitestorm will be scarred for life!" AGAIN with the scarred for life thing. Criminy, she-cats, WARRIORS GET SCARS.
IT IS PART OF YOUR GAL DANG LIFESTYLE ahdjdkdld;kdl
"Bluefur had stalked away fuming." (the poisonous gasses coming off her killed various plant and animal life.)
"She was furious at the way Thistleclaw seemed to pitch the apprentices against one another, again and again."
It's called TRAINING. Say it with me! T-R-A-I-N-I-N-G!
"Seeing the scar now, she still had to push away a bolt of anger."
...truly? You're still mad about something that happened moons ago, something that everyone else has probably FORGOTTEN by now because it doesn't matter?
All hail the mighty savior of ThunderClan, for she is truly wise and just.
Oh wait. Mood swing.
"What's done is done, she told herself. Perhaps Thistleclaw's ruthlessness (you mean non-wimpiness?) had made Whitestorm a better fighter."
Why I do feel like that was tacked on to show how 'good' Blue Sue is? Is it just me?
Blue Sue has a short exchange with Larksong, the tortoiseshell named after sound vibrations. (perhaps she oscillates instead of walking)
Larksong tells Blue Sue (paraphrasing here) that she's wasting her life, needs a mate, needs kits, needs someone to looooooooove. Gack.
direct quote-> "You need to live your own life now, Bluefur, before you wake up and realize you're as empty as a beech husk."
Um...is Larky telling Blue Sue to get knocked up? Because that's what it sounds like. Tell me if I have a dirty mind and there's some hidden meaning I'm missing here.
Luckily, Blue Sue shows a rare spark of intelligence, which she sadly does not keep later on:
"Is that how the old she-cat really saw life? Surely there was more to offer the Clan than kits!"
Exactly!
Why do all the single main she-cats, even ones who originally don't want mates, end up with them? Why? Can't there be one badass solitary she-cat who stops for no tom and lives life on the edge, laughing at all who dare try and tell her to have children? Please?
Alas, the plot leash is a cruel deity and will not answer my prayers.
"Larksong prodded the mouse and without looking up, rasped, "Maybe Thrushpelt has waited long enough."
HAHAHA.
As if Blue Sue would ever pick anyone logical to be her mate. I just realized the whole Thrush-Oak-Blue triangle is rather like Jacob, Edward, and Bella....except Thrushpelt isn't as awesome as Jacob occasionally is, and Oakheart doesn't sparkle. At least not to my knowledge.
The book mentions that Tawnyspots, the current deputy, is sick again. Blue Sue mentions that they might need a new one and she needs to be ready, and having a mate would only distract her. She does have a point, I think. I'm pretty sure there's an unwritten rule that she-cats with mates (or at least she-cats who have kits) can't be deputy.
Also, why are Bluestar and Leopardstar the only female leaders in the books? Nevermind, there's Mistystar too. But only four in the main 20 books or so, and only one other minus Blue Sue (Heatherstar the mutant) in the super editions? And we've never seen (at least not in the more recent generations) ANY female leaders in Shadow or Wind (Shadow had a female deputy, but whoops, she died.)
I'm not saying the warriors books are truly sexist; I've (unfortunately) read the history books of them, and there were truckloads of female leaders in the past, Shadow and Wind's founders were she-cats, though probably for symmetry reasons. I'm wondering why that changed. Maybe it's chance and I'm reading too much into this.
Although the female leaders we've seen have been idiots. Blue Sue is Blue Sue, and I'm sure you all know what Leopardstar did.
Anyway!
Blue Sue goes on a patrol, catches a moorhen. Oakheart (stalker man) congratulates her.
"The RiverClan tom was watching her from the far shore. Bluefur dropped her catch and glared at him. "Are you spying on me?"
"No." Oakheart looked mildly amused. "I'm allowed to patrol my own territory, you know."
GASP, personality!
...and then Blue Sue, who not even a full page ago said she didn't need a mate, didn't want love, didn't give a flying crap, implies that she likes him. And they barely even know each other.
Excuse me while my head meets a hard surface multiple times very intimately.
|
|
|
Post by Grey on Oct 5, 2012 5:35:53 GMT -6
This is very problematic.
This is really not okay.
The implication here is that, because Thrushpelt likes Bluefur, Bluefur should get with him. Oh ditch no.
That's really sick. Maybe this is just my reading of it, but Larksong makes it sound like poor, suffering, heart-broken tormented Romeo-Thrustpelt has been patiently waiting for Bluefur's love, while Bluefur's been off doing whatever Bluefur does (I'd say adventures, but seriously, we've all ready this thread, and adventures is the opposite of what's happening). She makes it sound like Bluefur owes it to Thrushpelt to settle down and have some offspring.
No. This is sounding like Nice Guy syndrome, and that's not cool.
Thrushpelt, dude. She doesn't owe you anything. You can't make her like you by liking her - even if you really, really, really like her and treat her like she's the best person ever. It doesn't change the fact she's not keen on you. That's basic, man.
Larksong is trying to guilt-trip Bluefur into a romantic relationship with a friend she doesn't actually find attractive, and she's saying it's for Bluefur's own good?
I am seriously so disgusted by this writing. In tumblr-speak, "I just can't".
If it was the other way around, I bet you anything it'd be different. If some tom was told to get with some she-cat that was pining after them, the fanbase would probably throw another Nightcloud-fit and call her all kinds of nasty things and get cross because she's desperate/creepy/obsessive/manipulative/et cetera.
But when it's a guy cat, it's 'charming'. Nice one, Erin Hunter. I want to write you a rude letter insulting your hygiene, morals, parentage and hobbies.
|
|
|
Post by celestialsquared on Oct 5, 2012 8:04:28 GMT -6
This is very problematic. This is really not okay. The implication here is that, because Thrushpelt likes Bluefur, Bluefur should get with him. Oh ditch no. That's really sick. Maybe this is just my reading of it, but Larksong makes it sound like poor, suffering, heart-broken tormented Romeo-Thrustpelt has been patiently waiting for Bluefur's love, while Bluefur's been off doing whatever Bluefur does (I'd say adventures, but seriously, we've all ready this thread, and adventures is the opposite of what's happening). She makes it sound like Bluefur owes it to Thrushpelt to settle down and have some offspring. No. This is sounding like Nice Guy syndrome, and that's not cool. Thrushpelt, dude. She doesn't owe you anything. You can't make her like you by liking her - even if you really, really, really like her and treat her like she's the best person ever. It doesn't change the fact she's not keen on you. That's basic, man. Larksong is trying to guilt-trip Bluefur into a romantic relationship with a friend she doesn't actually find attractive, and she's saying it's for Bluefur's own good? I am seriously so disgusted by this writing. In tumblr-speak, "I just can't". If it was the other way around, I bet you anything it'd be different. If some tom was told to get with some she-cat that was pining after them, the fanbase would probably throw another Nightcloud-fit and call her all kinds of nasty things and get cross because she's desperate/creepy/obsessive/manipulative/et cetera. But when it's a guy cat, it's 'charming'. Nice one, Erin Hunter. I want to write you a rude letter insulting your hygiene, morals, parentage and hobbies. I agree man, but then again this is Warriors. The whole point of a she-cat in this series is to get pregnant and to keep up the clan's population and every female is expected to put out at least one litter. Not to say that's not how it is for cats in real life, but seriously, the only solitary cat in the series was Leopardstar. Even Mistystar produced some kits at some point. So, what I really interpret old Larksong to be saying is, "Do your duty to the clan and reproduce!"
|
|
|
Post by Grey on Oct 5, 2012 9:05:18 GMT -6
Maybe, but it really could have been worded differently. At least not, "Come on, lass, get it together, this poor bloke's been waiting for ages for you to stop gallivanting about". As far as I'm concerned, Thrushpelt can just deal with it.
Are they, though? Or is that just a personal choice? Mousefur didn't. Leopardstar didn't. I can't remember if that was ever addressed or not, but it's a curiosity.
|
|
|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 5, 2012 9:46:09 GMT -6
Yeah pretty much. I loathe Larksong.
Thrushpelt is actually a pretty cool dude as we see later. I like him.
Hahahahah Nightcloud-fit. It amuses me how worked up people get over Crowfeather being a manwhore.
"I want to write you a rude letter insulting your hygiene, morals, parentage and hobbies."
Oh this is just the tip of the iceberg; wait until I put the newest Diary up after bringing over all of these. All sorts of fun stuff in there.
That's not actually true; I think this is just Larksong being a giant jerk. It's perfectly fine if a she-cat doesn't have kits. On the other hand (paw?) we do have the horrid babymakers like Ferncloud and Daisy. Don't even get me started on how much I hate them.
|
|
|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 5, 2012 9:52:03 GMT -6
This chapter, shockingly, is kind of interesting. At least part of it is.
It starts with Sunstar declaring that they need to take back Sunningrocks, which everyone thinks is just dandy. He says he wants to do so because winter (leaf-bare) is coming, and they need more hunting ground to feed the kits that White-eye is going to have. Amazingly, this makes sense.
Then he drops a bomb on his battle-happy friends: “I want to take Sunningrocks without a battle.”
“Thistleclaw stared at the Clan leader as if he’d grown an extra head.”
Sunstar named his extra head Fuzzles, and they practiced comedy acts together.
ThunderClan is all hey, we can’t just ask for it, that’s dumb. Tigerclaw says “Or are you going to beg?”
“Sunstar glared at the dark warrior. “ThunderClan never begs!” He unsheathed his claws.”
Ooo-kay. How’d Sunstar go from calm tactical leader to "I keel you!" within two seconds?
Then Sunstar says “Why should they risk a battle we don’t need to fight?” He goes on about how they have some of the most skilled warriors and that RiverClan doesn’t really need it, they only use it for sunbathing.
“We will show them our warriors (if they’ll show us theirs) and persuade them that giving up Sunningrocks would be a wise decision for both Clans.”
Hmm. I guess he has a point, but still, territory is territory. Assuming I don’t know what happens, I would say RiverClan wouldn’t just give it up to avoid a fight. Still…well, it’s interesting. It is kind of Firetard-ish, but then there’s this next bit:
“Sunstar nodded. “We’ll tell them that we own Sunningrocks and that we’ll shred any RiverClan cat who dares set paw on it again.”
That sounds much better. Threats work wonders. And yes, I’m being serious. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think this is actually a good strategy, especially since it doesn’t involve zombies, the plot leash, or Blue Sue.
No. I lied. He’s taking Blue Sue on the patrol to the RiverClan camp…hmm. Maybe not the smartest idea, after WindClan, as Blue Sue reminds us.
Sunstar takes his patrol, they run into RiverClanners who are rightfully suspicious but take them along anyway. They go…and Sunstar talks to Hailstar.
I shall proceed to relate their conversation.
“Sunstar dipped his head. “Sunningrocks belongs to ThunderClan,” he declared. “We are taking them back.”
Hailstar unsheathed his claws. “You’ll have to fight for them,” he growled.
“We will if we have to,” Sunstar meowed. “But we thought we’d give you fair warning.”
Timberfur padded forward, pelt bristling. “Are you threatening us in our own camp?” (Why yes, yes they are)
“We’re not threatening you,” Sunstar answered calmly. (Uh, yeah he is) “We’re giving you a choice. If you keep off Sunningrocks, we’ll leave you alone. But any cat who sets paw there will be shredded.”
Into party streamers.
“Hailstar stepped forward. “Do you really think we will give up the rocks so easily?” (I doubt he would be here if he thought otherwise...)
“If you prefer a battle, then we’ll fight.” Sunstar meowed.
(“If you prefer a straight answer, then yes.”)
Sunstar basically says they have enough food already, and they stink at hunting at Sunningrocks anyway, so why not give them to ThunderClan. I’m thinking that insulting RiverClan’s hunting abilities (even if he does have a point) isn’t the best way to get what he wants.
“But the RiverClan leader just stared (how rude), opening his mouth to scent the air. “I smell fear,” he snarled.”
Me smell fear...it smells like stinky cats…mmmm….
“Then it comes from your own warriors.” Sunstar countered.” Oooo, Hailstar got dissed.
“You actually expect us to give up Sunningrocks?” Hailstar hissed.”
No, Sunstar is here because he misses your pretty face and likes going into enemy territory for the heck of it. Why do you think, idiot?
“Sunstar shook his head. “I expect you to fight for them,” he meowed.” Geez, does the guy give no straight answers?
“Hailstar took a step toward the ThunderClan leader. “RiverClan warriors fight with claws, not words.”
I know I’ve seen that line somewhere before, and it sounds as moronic as ever.
“Very well.” Sunstar nodded. “Sunningrocks are ours. We will set the new markers tomorrow. After that, any RiverClan cat found there will face a fight he will not win.” He gazed around the camp and raised his voice. “Let all RiverClan know that the warning has been given. Any blood spilled now will be on Hailstar’s paws.”
Hmm.
“Bluefur was impressed by her leader’s strategy. He’d openly dared RiverClan to fight, yet made it look like their choice.”
I think it’s kind of clever. It seems to make sense, someone tell me if it doesn’t.
RiverClan gets irritated, then this odd bit happens:
“Ottersplash faced them, with Timberfur and Owlfur behind her. “We’ll escort you to the border,” she growled. “Thank you.” Sunstar dipped his head. “We’re only making sure you go back to your own territory.” Owlfur spat.”
Hmm. It makes sense that they’re suspicious of the ThunderClanners, but it doesn’t make sense that the ThunderClanners would have any reason to linger; the point of their visit was that they didn’t (or at least Sunstar didn’t) want to fight, they just wanted to talk to Hailstar. And it’s not like they can steal prey, since they don’t fish. Ah well.
Oakheart pops in, tags along with the escort, whispers to Blue Sue that he must talk to her and she needs to make an excuse.
Because that’s not stupid or suspicious at all.
“Bluefur twitched her ears. How could she get away from her patrol? Why should she? But the urgency in Oakheart’s voice nagged at her. She had to know what he wanted.”
There is no subtext here. None at all.
Blue Sue pretends to have a thorn, Oakheart says he’ll help her, and makes Thrushpelt (who faithfully stayed back to offer to help) back off.
“As soon as her Clanmates had disappeared around the corner (huh?) with their RiverClan escort, Oakheart faced her. “Thanks,” he breathed. “We need to talk.”
…about what, the number of times he’s annoyed her by being in her territory?
“Do we?” Bluefur was mystified. She shook her head, as though shaking would clear it. There was something about this warrior’s presence that made her feel dazed and fuzzy-headed.”
I’m going to assume the distortion of the universe caused by the pull of the plot leash.
“I haven’t seen you in moons!” Oakheart exclaimed.”
…though I’ve tried to, but since you’re so busy stalking your nephew, it’s hard to stalk you.
“Bluefur tipped her head to one side. (and it fell off and rolled away) “Why should you? We live in different Clans.”
SENSE?! –falls down in shock-
“Oakheart shifted his paws, looking uncharacteristically awkward. “I can’t stop thinking about you,” he blurted out. “Ever since last leaf-bare when we talked near the river.”
If I recall correctly they barely even had a conversation, and it was mostly Blue Sue being mad at him for lying on a rock in ThunderClan territory. You know, typical beginning-of-romantic-relationship meeting.
Or Oakheart really doesn’t have enough to occupy his mind.
“Bluefur backed away. “But that was ages ago! And you don’t even know me!”
WHAT?! Logic?!!! How dare you, Blue Sue! OBEY THE PLOT LEASH!
“I want to know you,” he insisted. “Everything about you-your favorite fresh-kill, your earliest memory, what you dream of…”
This isn’t creepy at all. Nope. Not a bit.
“Bluefur’s heart twisted. I don’t have time for this!” “You can’t!” she gasped. “The warrior code!”
“I’m too busy being a creepy aunt, bug off.”
“Oakheart impatiently shook his head. (why is she resisting the plot leash, he wondered) “This isn’t about the code. This is about us. Meet me tomorrow at moonhigh at Fourtrees.”
“I can’t!” Bluefur protested. (I’m going to be too busy picking out specks of grit from between Whitestorm’s precious paws)
“Just meet me,” Oakheart begged. “Give me a chance!” His green eyes were round and pleading.”
The ThunderClan patrol finally figures out that Bluefur has been “getting a thorn out” for a suspiciously long time (perhaps they assumed the thorn was epic, with jet packs and killer lasers)
She goes with them, and then we get these last lines.
“As she crossed the stepping-stones, she felt sure Oakheart was looking at her. Her pelt burned. (and promptly went up in flames) He was watching. She knew it. But she didn’t look back.”
How does she know he’s watching if she can’t see him?
|
|
|
Post by cloudbat on Oct 5, 2012 9:56:55 GMT -6
“Give me a chance!”
I swear to be the best illogical forbidden lover ever!
“A chance for what?”
For Oakheart to wow her with his tomly charms and sweep her off her paws, and then they will dance among the stars on clouds made of dreams and kisses while the plot leash watches over them.
“She didn’t need to ask. She knew. The intensity in his mew, the desperation in his eyes. Seeing his longing was like looking at a reflection of her own heart. She felt the same tug. The same longing to be close.”
HAHAHA.
I don’t see how anyone can read this and not laugh. It’s just…I don’t have the words. It’s too silly to even describe. Granted, I am not a romantic person, but I’m assuming two people who barely know each other would feel this way.
Also, a reflection of her own heart? Hey Blue Sue, didn’t you not want a mate so you could be deputy and then leader? Hypocrisy called; it said you owed it a lot of money.
And you want to be close to an almost-total stranger, and you have no way of knowing if he has good intentions or not.
I salute you, for you are truly a wise and rational cat who is fit to be leader of ThunderClan.
*gags*
“But how could they be together?”
Tying you both to a board would work, or perhaps supergluing your sides together would be better.
Blue Sue gets up, “floundered out of her nest” and goes outside. Then we get this exchange between Thrushpelt and Spottedpaw. (Spottedsue)
“Spottedpaw!” Thrushpelt called down the fern tunnel to his apprentice.”Stop bothering Featherwhisker! Come and see what your duties are for the day.” “Sorry.” Spottedpaw hurried out with flecks of herbs on her paws. “I was just helping him mix comfrey.”
A likely story.
Some cats discuss the patrol that will be sent to Sunningrocks later, and Blue Sue thinks this:
“Bluefur’s heart quickened. What if she met Oakheart in battle? How could she fight him now?”
Let’s see…it can’t possibly be because you’re loyal to your Clan. Other than that, can’t imagine.
She tells a few lies about the “thorn” she stepped on yesterday, when Featherwhisker inquires about it.
“If StarClan didn’t want her to meet Oakheart, surely they would have said something to Featherwhisker, something that would make him stop her? Maybe StarClan wanted this to happen. Maybe it was her destiny.”
Cause this is my destinyyyyy! You teach me, and I’ll teach you, war-ri-orrrrrs! WARRIORS!
No dear. StarClan doesn’t really care. However, the plot leash has its own evil plans. Besides, what would Featherwhisker say? “Oh, Bluefur, don’t go out and meet the random RiverClan warrior who’s creepily obsessed with you. We good?”
“What would he say?”
I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.
“What would she say?”
Mischief managed! (Presuming, of course, that wink wink nudge nudge.)
“What if she did something mouse-brained, like trip over her own tail?”
How would she even…no, wait. Supertails.
Then the patrol who was marking Sunningrocks came back and announces that they had no trouble from RiverClan, and these are Blue Sue’s first thoughts:
“Bluefur felt relief washing over her pelt (it then melted the flesh from her bones.) Oakheart was safe.”
That’s your first priority now? Not your Clan, the one you want to become leader of? Not the one that you told me for 200 pages was the one and only thing you cared about besides stalking your nephew?
Gosh, Blue Sue is the potential leader I want her to be.
“Sunstar gazed around his Clan. “From now on, no Clan will threaten our borders.”
Unless, you know, they don’t really care that you currently have Sunningrocks, which has been a running feud for generations and is old news.
“Bluefur got to her paws. What was the mood in the RiverClan camp? Bleak enough for Oakheart to change his mind about meeting a ThunderClan cat? She would still go to Fourtrees. If he felt half as restless and distracted as she did, he’d be there.”
Fair point, or it would be if this made any sense. Besides from being pointless, this doesn’t really serve the plot either. It’s just there. While Bluestar’s Prophecy is undoubtedly 90% filler, much of it does, in some vague way, serve the very loose plot. This? Not at all. It’s just here so Blue Sue can have another angst barrel before she becomes deputy and then leader. And to provide future fodder for Tigerstar’s takeover with halfClan discrimination.
Anyway, back to Blue Sue in the present, where she’s being annoyed that her Clanmates won’t go to bed for a while and that she might be late for Oakheart, heaven forbid.
Then we get a sudden infusion of sense. “Oh, StarClan, what am I doing? Was she really going to slip out of camp and meet the RiverClan warrior? Her paws felt clammy. Am I mad?”
Granted, I can understand how doubts would creep in during this sort of situation. But I think they should’ve happened much earlier, especially if she’s so dedicated to her goals as we’ve been lead to believe.
Blue Sue unwillingly goes to eat with her Clanmates (the ungrateful brat) and the sparrow she eats “tastes like splintered wood.”
It’s not her saying it tastes like wood that irritates me; I’ve tasted wood and it doesn’t taste good. (Don’t ask me why.) It’s the splintered part. Why would the wood being splintered make it taste any different? It would make it feel different, not taste different. Touch =/= taste. Even if that’s what she meant, it’s a sparrow. It’s not like it’s covered in spines. Maybe the bones are sharp? But she wouldn’t be eating those.
Where was I? Oh yes. Angst barrel. Evidently Blue Sue “couldn’t imagine being hungry ever again.”
…except for what Oakheart can give her, if you know what I mean.
“Her heard thudded and skittered”
And then it leapt out of her chest and ran away, being unable to take the bad writing anymore.
“The den was dark, despite the swollen moon.”
Aw, no magical green color changing? Also, how can the moon be swollen? That makes me think of a wound or a berry.
“She curled down in the moss, eyes wide, as her denmates settled around her. None of them seemed willing to end the celebrations.”
Until the elders came and yelled at them youngins’ to turn the music down, it was cracking their dentures.
“Were they going to talk about those wretched stones till dawn?”
I read stones as stoned at first, and wondered if Goosefeather was initiating more members into the cult.
And then we get this lovely contradiction:
“At last the den grew quiet. Gentle snores filled the air.”
If there’s snoring, it’s not quiet.
Blue Sue slips out, and there are “No signs of life.”
Of course, she killed everyone to ensure she could meet Oakheart. “No signs of movement” would have been a better term.
She slips past Adderfang, who apparently doesn’t notice. (Perhaps the plot leash stole his nose?)
Then we get a sudden Moment of Indecision, which sadly does not turn into the realm of sense and logic.
“She couldn’t believe what she was doing; betraying everything that had once been important to her. She was a traitor, and not just to herself. To her Clan. To the warrior code. What was she doing? She had to go back. Peering over the rock, she saw Adderfang returning to his post. There was no way she could retrace her steps without being seen. She had to go on.”
This is just NOW dawning on her? And had once? So everything she wouldn’t shut up about and how she must be leader to stop Thistleclaw from getting everyone killed just ceases to matter because of this random-*** RiverClan warrior with questionable intentions? Gee, I’m glad I read 300 pages on a plot centered around that very thing and now get told the main character doesn’t give a flying crap anymore.
Whee!
And no, Blue Sue, you don’t “have to go on.” You can jolly well stay put there until morning and forget about the creepy tom who “loves” you. Or better yet, you can stroll back into camp and explain to Adderfang what you’re doing out there. I’m sure he’d love to hear it.
“Moonlight shone through the bare branches, making the forest floor glow.”
It illuminated a path of magic, wonder, and non-logic pointing straight to Oakheart.
“Had he waited?”
He passed the time thinking up progressively more questionable situations involving you, him, and a bush.
“Her heart rose in her throat (and suffocated her) when she reached the edge of the hollow…If Bluefur kept going, she would change the course of her life.”
Angst barrel 3, activate!
“For a moment she sensed the spirit of Snowfur.”
“If you let this tom into your pants (even if you don’t have any) I will kick you to the Dark Forest, sista!”
“Her sister’s scent drifted in the air as birch-smooth fur wreathed around her pelt. Snowfur was trying to tell her something.”
Naturally, the usual methods of communication involve wrapping around someone and clogging their nostrils. Gets the message across perfectly.
“What is it? Frustration surged through Bluefur’s pelt. Was Snowfur trying to stop her, or was she giving her blessing?”
Maybe “blessing” is another word for “condom”.
“I have to do this,” Bluefur whispered. “Please understand. It doesn’t mean that I don’t love you (I just "love" Oakheart more), or that I’m not loyal to my Clan.”
I’m just loyal to my hormones more.
|
|
|
Post by mistytail on Oct 5, 2012 10:38:34 GMT -6
I agree man, but then again this is Warriors. The whole point of a she-cat in this series is to get pregnant and to keep up the clan's population and every female is expected to put out at least one litter. Not to say that's not how it is for cats in real life, but seriously, the only solitary cat in the series was Leopardstar. Even Mistystar produced some kits at some point. So, what I really interpret old Larksong to be saying is, "Do your duty to the clan and reproduce!" With all due respect, I must passionately disagree with that last bit. Don't forget that this is a series about anthropomorphized cats directed at 8-12 year old children. The series orignally opened with a very nonchalant attitude to reproducing, where mating was no big deal and love was not an issue. It was about keeping the population up. Then the Erins got online, found out the fanbase was mostly young girls, and the writing changed dramatically. Suddenly the writing became all about finding your true love and having kits with them, how spunky she-cats like Sandstorm and Squirrelflight needed a tom to "tame the fire in their spirit" or whatever balderdash they're feeding us. Hell, the entire plot of the last two series of books were all based on the forbidden love of Leafpool and Crowfeather. Because love suddenly became a big deal, which is a human thing and not a cat thing, the attitude towards reproduction changed. Having kits was like getting married, you were now mates with that cat unril you ungracefully broke it off (ie Brambleclaw and Squirrelflight). Meaning that, yes, the Erins are promoting the Nice Guy(tm) agenda here and it makes me sick to my fricking stomach. This honestly the most sexist and inherently misogynistic thing I have ever seen in this series, and I am ashamed, genuinely ashamed, to have loved these books so much as a child. I would not let my own children anywhere near these books with a ten foot pole if this attitude that women owe men sex and relationships and they're not free to make their own choices and their whole life must center around finding the perfect mate. It's disgusting and I am so glad I didn't spend money on this book now. Ugh. (edit: sorry for the wall of text, i just got back from some pre-surgical testing and was checking FR on my phone. just snipped it now so it's not a ginormous post)
|
|